A wedding, new shoes, and a calling

Don't worry I'll get back to questions soon.  I believe Jammie's is next on the list.  But I've been busy like a madman lately, and I figured I'd throw a little stuff out here.  I've been lucky enough to get a lot of hours at work lately.  I say lucky, because I know my budget needs it oh so much. Oh the budget. I'm going to make it now.  There have been so many gifts that have come in every shape and size, not the least of which are the opportunities to work. But with all the babysitting, I don't have spare moments and find myself running from one thing to the next.  I've worked 30-40 hours at my "job" and added babysitting on top of that.  It's been a little busy. Today I finally had a few breathing moments and I took a 3 hour nap.  I think I was allowed it, though, since I had to be up at 5.  More on that in a minute.

This weekend I attended my friend Tricia's wedding.  It was lovely.  Really a perfect day. And Tricia is one of those perfectly perfect people who deserves every happiness, and I have honestly never seen a happier bride.  I don't know if anything went wrong or not, but I do know that if it did, she wasn't phased by it.  She just kept grinning and her cute new hubby just kept gazing at her and it made for a lovely day.  Rumor is that there wasn't a single meltdown.  Now that's remarkable. 

We went to the sealing, then we went shopping for wedding presents and bought shoes for ourselves as well.  I felt guilty at first, for getting shoes when I was supposed to be focusing on a present for someone else, and for spending money.  But as I considered returning the shoes I realized a few things.  First of all, shoes are an essential.  I can hardly walk around barefoot, now can I?  Second of all, I didn't actually own a pair of sensible tennis shoes.  They were on sale too.  And the not-sensible pair was on clearance for $10.  So there, shoe police!

(Do you see how I am rationalizing the shoes?) The other reason I decided that the shoe shopping was justified is just this:  I go to a lot of weddings.  I resent how many weddings I've attended and smiled through.  And while I didn't feel the usual frustration/mystification/begrudging/hurt that I frequently feel at weddings (seriously, Tricia is that wonderful, I couldn't begin to be grumpy at her happiness, nor did I have any doubts or questions at the match) I still recognize the emotional tendancy for weddings to throw me into a depression.  I'm just being honest, and if you'd like to judge me for it go on ahead.  It's not bitterness, its just the natural response to watching your own hopes be realized by someone else.  Anyways.  Weddings usually send me into a tailspin for a day or two.  But instead of crawling into a hole and crying for a day, I got up on sunday morning and put on a new pair of shoes as if I was sticking my tongue out at the whole world.  Fine.  I'll be single.  But I'll be single with fabulous shoes. And the longer I'm single, the more shoes I will be collecting.   And I know Tricia wouldn't begrudge me the shoes or the self-indulgence.  She herself is the owner of a fabulous pair of red heels that came at the agonizing potential of missing a bus in Philadelphia.  She knows shoes.

While I'm talking about weddings, I should mention that ribbing the groom about how long it took him to find a bride is a bit inappropriate.  Especially on his wedding day to my perfect friend.  Sure its a fun little joke.  But if he had raced off and married the first nice girl he met after his mission, he wouldn't have ended up with my amazing friend.  Or if they had met and married earlier, neither of them would ahve had the experiences that have made them as fabulous as they are now.  Everyone has a different path.  And for some people, that whirlwind romance in your early 20's is just right.  Others wait a bit, experience some life, make a career, maybe join a choir, meet more people and see more life, and their path should not be mocked. These guys are barely 30.  They still have plenty of time to be married and have kids and all that. 

Tiny Soapbox. 

But Nancy, non of this explains why you were up at 5 this morning!
Oh yes, that.
Well I have a new calling. 
And I won't share details here. 
But I am now an organist in the Salt Lake Temple and this morning was my first shift. 
Now I'm not great, but I'll get better. 
And as far as callings in the church go, I'm feeling pretty awesome.

Just think about it.  As a kid, Temple Square was where we came on vacation.  It was our tourist destination of choice.  Now I spend more time there every week than I spend at my own home.  And I spend it there doing music-y things that I love. This weird little girl from podunk minnesota didn't stay stuck.  And all those people that said I should just get a job in the window factory and resign myself to a life of nothing and nowhere can eat it. 

I'm not saying I did it alone, or at all, I'm not saying I have arrived, and I'm not taking credit.  I'm just saying they were wrong.  And when I told them I had a bigger life in front of me, I was right. There have been a hundred people on the road telling me to give up.  And there have been a hundred more telling me to keep going.  And more than any of those people, there have been a select few marvelous incredible people who not only told me to keep going, they showed me how.  They took me by the hand and taught me things and showed me the next few steps on the path, and when I was ready to listen to the naysayers, they wouldn't let me.  So it's not all me.  There are people who deserve so much credit for my happiness.  And anyone who has ever given encouragement has a place in my heart.  I'm ready to keep going for a bit longer.  There are miles yet to travel.